When I look over my left shoulder, I dont see it at all. All I see is life.
But when I look over my right shoulder, however, I see it standing there, so close. When I see how close it actually is, that is when I realise that that is the reason why I do not see it when I look over my left shoulder…. it is too close.
I see depression as an actual being. Completely black but with a bright white smile. Not a friendly smile. Almost like a demon.
I am fighting the urge that tells me to look over my right shoulder, the urge to look closer. I am not scared of depression anymore… I have fought and won many battles.
But what I do not understand about myself is that I have always done it in complete silence.
Anyways, like the titles says, I am not in a depression which I am grateful for. I have actually been having some really good days. I finally understood why images of the abuse came back to haunt me so vividly for a while. And the reason was very silly, so maybe they are gone again. ❄️❄️
~ Rebecca ~