Family rant.

I just found out my brother is going to be a father.

I found out…. on facebook. In a general post to ‘the public’. Now, I have always felt that I was the odd one out in our family but I did always assume I had a higher status than facebook. I hardly feel part of this family anymore but this still really hurt.

So I started binge eating. Mature hugh. My emotions are all over the place. I want to yell at my family, I want to hide in a corner, I want to scream at the top of my lungs, I want to tell my sister how I actually feel about her (that bitch), I want for my dog to not be considered old…. and yet I smile.

I wont tell my family how I feel. Maybe they are not my family anymore… I did leave for a reason. I thought they could not hurt me anymore since I moved so far away. How wrong I was.

I also thought I was over the ‘childhood’ that I had. How wrong I was.

Sometimes it takes me by surprise, my bitterness.

~ Rebecca ~

 

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8 Comments Add yours

  1. Mindfump says:

    That is a terrible way to find out. I feel your pain. Although I think sharing your feelings with them might be beneficial.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Rebecca says:

      I sometimes think so too! But I would never want to do that over e-mail or phone…. maybe one day when I am visiting I will actually find the courage.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Mindfump says:

        Yeah I thnk that is the best way too.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Janet says:

    Just came back by to say I love you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Rob says:

    Oh I’m sorry for you to learn that way. Your feelings are valid. And keep in mind just as quickly you can invalidate them and break the chains of the ones keeping you mired down.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Rebecca says:

      But honestly I don’t know why I ecpected anything else from them.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Rob says:

        Then there you go. I’m AA they say “Drop The Rock.” You’ll know how it applies

        Liked by 1 person

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